Who can be a parent?

Let’s begin by expanding the definition of what a ‘parent’ actually is. Traditionally (in the 3D, everyday sense of the word) a parent is someone who is the biological or non-biological mother or father of a child. And yet, as we know it, the role of a parent is a sacred one, a role that is far-reaching in its influence. It’s a role that exists far beyond any biological implications.

Parenting as a path of growth and soul maturity, displays itself in many forms and develops along many lines. Indeed, anyone can step into the role of a parent, by virtue of becoming fully responsible for the rearing, mentoring and/or direct guidance of a child or younger one in your full-time care. So, if you’re reading this now and are unsure of whether or not to call yourself a ‘parent’, I encourage you to expand your horizons and to embrace parenting from a higher consciousness perspective.

It’s not just humans

And of course, it’s not just humans (souls experiencing humanity) that can take on the role of being a parent, but so too, do all biological lifeforms on this planet. Animals (souls in animal form) are amazing parents and in many ways have much to teach humanity about the raising of those in their care to become self-sufficient, grounded, productive and self-aware contributors on this planet. We’ve all seen animals that we cherish and admire taking on the role of parent to their own offspring and also to other lifeforms. For love and spiritual connection are the same amongst us all. A parent is a parent, across the whole spectrum of form.

The role of a parent – from a spiritual perspective

From a spiritual perspective (and a physical one) the role of a parent is to raise mature, healthy, well-adjusted, adaptable, self-sufficient, engaged, aware and conscious adults; ready to go off into the world, adding great value to society, making their impact known and their capacity for love felt, all around the globe. Perhaps this sounds like a tall order? Especially given that many parents have never been raised this way themselves and are raising their children the best way that they know how.

However, this blog post is addressing conscious parenting from a spiritual perspective, whereby one is aware of the great responsibility that they’ve asked for in raising another soul (a child) in their direct care. From this broader approach, we must see the role of parent from the highest soul perspective. Therefore, doing your best to be self-reflective and to become conscious of the impact that you’re having upon another life, is of the greatest importance.

The spiritually unaware style of parenting (that many cultures adopt globally, as a matter of survival) can see children being raised to be totally loyal to the family, dependent upon them and even responsible for the ongoing care of adult parents (and the entire family unit) throughout their lifetime. So, rather than raising children who feel free to choose a life path that best suits their talents and skills, children can be raised to feel dominated by their parents needs and wishes, never quite fulfilling their own unique desires and eventually feeling unsatisfied with their path and purpose

I’ve worked with many seemingly successful professional adults, in places like Singapore, India and Hong Kong (for example) who have come to me feeling spiritually trapped and crippled because of the expectations of their parents, that are not in alignment with who they are or feel they are allowed to be.

Passing on the baton – running a relay race

When parents knowingly or unknowingly hand over their expectations, fears and desires to their children, this then leads to what I call ‘passing on the baton – unconsciously’ from one generation to the next. It’s like running a relay race, where parents raise their children based upon what they know and how they were raised (whether that be good or bad) without considering that their children are unique souls, with unique talents and skills, who are here to not only mature those life skills, but to also teach their parents to do the same. They pass on the same issues from generation to generation, until someone stops, becomes conscious and breaks the chain.

When one becomes spiritually conscious and wakes up to who they are as a soul (leading a human life) then one can knowingly choose to raise their children differently and with greater regard than how they were raised. Inevitably, you may make the same mistakes as your parents before you, but you’ll realise when it’s happening and you’ll have the opportunity to make conscious choices, that perhaps your parents weren’t privy to.

The soul chooses

Indeed, it may seem that some humans consciously choose to become parents, while others may seemingly have the role thrust upon them. Many may long to become parents, without realising that there are many ways in which this path can unfold. Indeed, many are reluctant parents, but from the perspective of the soul (the infinite being of the light that you are) you most certainly do choose and do know when and how you’ll become a parent from lifetime to lifetime.

Choosing parents and children – the soul perspective

Before you ever incarnated into physical form, consider that as a soul (born of spirit) you have amassed eons of life experiences. These are life experiences (talents, skills, patterns and cycles) that you wish to utilise, grow and expand from in your coming human life. Soul is like a great recording device. Every experience that you’ve ever had and every experience that you’ll ever have, are all recorded upon the shimmering fabric of your soul. Just imagine how much innate intelligence you carry and what you know. Just imagine how wise you are.

You carry every experience with you, both positive and negative. Hence, IF it will serve your soul well to become a parent during this lifetime, then you will choose to manifest this role, in one form or another.

You’ll choose before you ever incarnate into human form how and when you’ll become a parent and who your children will be. It’s likely that your child/children are well known to you as souls, for you’ve both shared the role of parent and/or child, over many lifetimes.

Likewise, the children of parents, do indeed choose who their parents will be, way before they ever incarnate on this planet. So the age old saying that, ‘You don’t choose your parents’, is innately flawed from the spiritual perspective. For we do choose. Embracing this reality automatically brings the power back home to you and puts you in the seat of owning your innate self-responsibility.

Learning and growing from being a parent

When you choose to take on the role of a parent to a child, from a spiritual consciousness perspective, you’ll be receiving major life growth through the vehicle of that role. While you may have other roles that you also learn and serve through over your lifetime, i.e. friend, partner, work colleague, adult child to your own parent/s etc. your role ‘as a parent’ will become a major life growth focus for you.

Children as mirrors of your own childhood

So, this means that your child or children, whether biological or not, human or animal, will also be teaching you and growing from your influence. Your children serve as mirrors into and reminders of your own childhood experiences. Any parent will tell you that the act of raising their children will bring up constant memories of their own childhood, the positives and the negatives. And this is where being conscious of cycles and patterns will make all the difference with the influence that you choose to wield upon your impressionable child.

Conscious choice should be of major importance when parenting your children. As a parent, while you’ll take actions that you know you can improve upon each day, the more that you can realise where and how you can improve, the more effectively, you’ll not only grow and learn from being a parent, but so too, will your children.

Children are energy sponges

For children are like energy sponges. They literally soak up everything that their primary mentors, their ‘parents’ offer to them. It will serve you well (as a conscious parent) to set aside some time each day to have your own reality check. Ask yourself if you’re operating on auto-pilot or are you really taking the time to slow down and relate to your child as another conscious being?

Let’s look at some of the ways that you can become an effective conscious parent by taking a spiritual approach:

• Consider what an honour it is to mentor (as a parent) another soul in a human body. Your child or children chose you. You chose them. Together you are the perfect fit for the life lessons that you all wish to master – this lifetime.

• If you see your child displaying characteristics that you don’t agree with or that you’re judging as bad or wrong, ask yourself, ‘What is this teaching me? Why do I have a problem with it? What am I to learn?’ Then apply the answers that you receive.

• You’re here to learn and grow through your role as a parent. And on the grander scale, via the actions that you take with your child, you’re creating our conscious future generations. Your life and role as a parent carries great weight.

• Learn how to meditate so that you can dive into your own heart (soul) each day and grow and mature from being a parent.

• Consider that your child will be hungry for discipline and boundaries around how to operate and interact with others within the Earth environment. Teach them well, walk your talk and ensure that what you’re asking your child to do and be, you’re also displaying in abundance.

• Your child may be a wise, old soul, but they have a new human body. They need your grounded, firm and fair direction. They’ll be looking up to you for their example of how to behave and how to create a healthy life flow.

• You are your child’s role model as a spiritually conscious being. Every day, consider that you hold great responsibility and love that you do! What an amazing life role you have and how you get to prove your worth and capability through living it.

• Consider that your children will constantly remind you of your own pains and insecurities growing up. They’ll trigger your dark and suppressed side, as well as old, past wounds. It’s your task to learn to recognise this and to not push your fears back onto your child.

• Children are here to help you overcome your old cycles, so that you can be free. You do the same for them. It’s a symbiotic relationship. The way to achieve this is to develop compassion and empathy for your child and for the child that still lives within you.

• Your role as a parent may be the greatest self-healing role that you’ll ever undertake. LOVE IT!

• It’s your responsibility as a parent, to give over your balanced energy and focus to raise, protect, nurture, support and mentor the one/s in your care.

• Know that the more spiritually conscious and grounded you become, the stronger your presence will be felt and appreciated by all.

Your children are our future. You hold great weight and responsibility. You chose this role, perform it well.

**By Elizabeth Peru

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