The National Security Agency (NSA) announced today that they have concluded their corruption investigation targeting Maui County and the State of Hawaii. They discovered a $45 million annual drug ring operating through the Maui Police Department (MPD) selling methamphetamines and heroin, planting false evidence including pipes and drugs on innocent people, and protecting affiliated drug rings.
The corruption spread into the Maui County administration and nearly all of the departments. Over 700 public servants are complicit and will be brought to justice, NSA predicts.
Similarly, the State of Hawaii will soon be indicted in a massive human trafficking/enslavement ring. State workers have been selling Hawaiian babies on the black market for $30,000 apiece. To date, 232 babies have been sold, netting $6.96 million for the human trafficking ring.
“Maui County is a central hub of our operations,” said NSA director GEN Paul M. Nakasone. “We were appalled when it came to our attention the massive corruption in Maui County, and we decided it was National Security issue, and it became our perogative to investigate immediately.”
An NSA team of 400 analysts sprang into action and completed their investigation in about 5 hours, amassing about 2000 hours of research. They analysed all MPD-issued phone records as well as personal phone records of all members of the Maui Police Department in late July.
NSA has targeted all the guilty parties.
“Now it is just a matter of time that the drug dealing, protection of drug rings, planting of drug evidence on innocent parties and corruption will see the light of Justice served,” GEN Nakasone said.
NSA expects a massive backlog on the legal system and has suggestions to aid the processing of the accused, such as reopening a Wailea hotel for inmate housing.
For the State of Hawaii baby selling operations, NSA is expecting an immediate shutdown, with all State workers involved immediately jailed. The CIA and FBI will be expected to spearhead an international baby hunt to bring the babies home to Hawaii where they belong to be reunited with their parents.
For more information, visit the National Security Agency at www.nsa.gov and fill out an online request form. Due to high volume, your request may not be answered. Or, call Eric T. Richter of Maui Promotions, national press contact at (808) 669-9091 or email firstname.lastname@example.org