[Question] What happens when one spouse has an abundance perspective and the other spouse has a poverty mindset?
What can someone do in that situation, to help their partner think more in terms of abundance?
[The Collective] We are quite thankful that you have raised this issue, as so many are troubled by it. For the question of how you and your loved ones—or even those who are simply in your environment each day—influence one another’s perspective and overall vibration, is a very great one.
You are correct that being around someone whose vibration is different from yours has a definite effect on the “pitch” or frequency of your own vibration. It is possible, in other words, that you would begin to worry about some aspect of your finances merely because you are daily around someone who is experiencing fear or feelings of lack in that area.
You appear to have fended off that tendency, and to be fully aware of your partner’s vibration in regards to money.
So long as you are conscious of such, you will tend to notice when your vibration dips down a bit due to your loved one’s vibration, and you will be able to right yourself again, and come back up to a higher level of thought and feeling regarding abundance.
There must first be an awareness that there is a blockage or imbalance in thought and emotion where wealth is concerned, followed by a clear intent to change.
In the case of one who is experiencing and living out lack-and-loss programming around money and abundance, we would say, that as in all things, they must come to the place within themselves where they realize that they do not enjoy feeling uncertain or fearful or grimly negative, or hard-work-and-struggle oriented.
From that realization, they must then decide, “I’m going to change my outlook. I’m going to see if I can’t take on the same ideas and emotional resonance about wealth that this wonderfully fulfilled, joyful person clearly has. I’m going to find out what they know that I don’t!” Or something to that effect.
And so while that is not the entire journey, that is at least a beginning, and an important one—a new birth of thought and realization.
You see how there must first be an awareness that there is a blockage or imbalance in thought, belief, and emotion where wealth is concerned—something very wrong, at the base—followed by a clear intent to change, to let in more Light, more air. Some new ideas, and a whole new perspective on not only their own situation, but money and abundance in general.
The poverty mindset isn’t actually about money and abundance at all. You have probably noted several persons you have met who were born into or who have earned large sums of money, yet who are utterly stingy, fearful of spending, living simply to the point of strain and stress on their possessions, diet, health, or relationships.
And yet, they have hundreds of thousands or even millions (or billions) in the bank.
If one does not already feel wealthy, having a great deal of money and many fine things will not cure feelings of lack and insecurity.
Many millionaires and billionaires, whether they made their money themselves or inherited it, live in constant fear of not having enough money, or of mishandling what they have, or being swindled out of it.
Many live in fear of a “market crash” or some other outer catastrophe that they feel has the power to disinherit or impoverish them in the blink of an eye.
And so this idea that “If I only had more money, all would go smoothly for me” is utterly unfounded, and almost humorous. Money is not the thing that makes one feel wealthy. Far from it.
If one does not already feel wealthy, having a great deal of money, property, and many fine things will not cure feelings of lack and insecurity.
And so now you ask, Then what does make a person feel wealthy? How do you take on a whole new perspective and vibration—a prosperity consciousness that banishes poverty consciousness once and for all?
We would say, that you already hold this answer within you. As with the vast majority of humankind, there are things that you are fully aware of in the world, which you completely appreciate, never doubt are there for you, never feel might not be there for you, and are utterly dependent upon yet utterly sure of, at the same time.
(Money does not actually determine whether you remain alive or not, despite the extensive mental programming that has taught you such—but we will work with this analogy at present.)
Think of something you take constantly for granted in the sense that you know it will always be there for you. It might be the beauty of Nature, the air you breathe, having clean, drinkable water, or your own education. It might be the love of a friend or family member—and yes, that love continues, regardless of whether you are both still on the Earth or not, or are getting along at the moment.
It might be the sense of your life purpose or soul mission, your love of music or art, your love and compassion for children or animals, or simply the joy of being alive.
Choose something, right now, that you never doubt or cease to be thankful for.
We assure you, that so long as you carry that vibration—that beautiful, joyful certainty that the Universe’s door is always wide open to that particular gift, with conscious appreciation for all it gives you—that you never will be without that person, place, or experience, whatever it may be.
Your experience of it may shift over the years, and certainly, all outer forms are in a constant flow of renewal and rebirth, as with everything in this Universe. But remain with you it shall, for as long you and your higher self welcome it.
Money and abundance are no different. Your experience of yourself as either wealthy or poor depends upon your expectations, emotions, belief in, and appreciation of wealth, in all forms, regardless of what outer circumstances try to give you in this or any Earth life.
And your partner’s experience of true wealth likewise hinges upon their willingness to shift, in stages, to a place of near-effortless appreciation and allowance of the flow of abundance.
This includes the belief in the steady flow of abundance in all its forms, day in and day out, as a natural and joyful part of life that should never be questioned, only given thanks for and experienced fully, with all the senses.
And so—how it is that some have plenty of money, but no appreciation for it, while others who say affirmations and give thanks for all they have, still tend to go without much money, for large periods of their life?
We would say, that there are always several things at work, in every Earth being’s life. The first is what you do not see, yet are constantly steered by: your unconscious reality, which is constantly tapped into and drawn upon by your conscious self when molding your daily life, and which the higher self works to evolve, but does not “save” you from.
That unconscious reality has been powerfully trained and molded by your childhood, the experiences of your past lives, and the predominant vibration on your planet regarding money.
The second is the Earth life design or blueprint you came in with, which as we have discussed in another chapter, may well need to be revised . . .